When it comes to quadrennial (SAT word alert!) spectacles, there’s no better example of what’s right and wrong with humanity than the Olympics. Sure, a presidential election brings out the crazies in droves and the World Cup has the corruption part down to a science. But the Games have the right mixture of athletics, corruption, jingoistic fervor and drama that make the sixteen day festival totally unique.
If you accept that the Olympics are a made-for-television event, enjoyment of the Games becomes an easy endeavor. No doubt that out of the 306 medal events on display, most of the sports are ones that we as red-blooded Americans either actively ignore (I’m looking at you, gymnastics), look at as exercise (what’s up, swimming?), or laugh at completely (equestrian, a.k.a. rich people on horses).
As much as NBC can get really heavy on the sticky sweet athlete profiles (I get it…the athlete has trained in obscurity for four years while his or her family has supported them fully while sacrificing totally. Enough! Show me some people running!) they do provide necessary context that makes watching the TV show commonly known as the Olympics easier. Put it this way, it’s a lot easier to watch an obscure sport populated by people you don’t know if you have some backstory that maybe gets you emotionally invested.
Come for Usain Bolt and stay to see the greatest country on the planet scoop up gold like Sonic The Hedgehog…USA! USA!
Hold your mouth for the war, use it for what it’s for…
Mouth For War
Vulgar Display Of Power