KNBR radio host Tom Tolbert had a wild Monday night. Little did he know that after his head hit the pillow, Tolbert would transported to the midwest, to eavesdrop on a meeting between Giants VP of Baseball Operations Farhan Zaidi and Giants pitcher Madison Bumgarner, just days before the trade deadline.
But that was only the beginning.
Here’s how Tolbert described the truly hilarious dream he had Monday night to co-host Larry Krueger on Tuesday afternoon:
“I think I was able to ascertain I was in some kind of hospital in Nebraska,” Tolbert began. “For whatever reason. And I’m walking around this hospital and I’m being given a tour of the hospital.
“Then there were these people that were delivering these t-shirts, and I couldn’t make out what was on these t-shirts that they were giving away. And there were like thousands of these t-shirts…And I found out, they also gave them away in Iowa…Not only did they give them away in Iowa, for whatever reason if you accepted one of their t-shirts, they mowed your yard. Don’t ask me why, I just know they mowed your yard.
“I get to a sink, a kitchen sink. And it’s not really in a kitchen, it’s just kind of a kitchen sink, and it’s still inside but there’s nothing really around the sink. And for whatever reason — this is where it gets a little weird — I open the cupboard underneath the sink, and there’s Bumgarner and Zaidi. I kid you not they are in the cupboard talking to each other.
“I’m like ‘oh man. I might be able to hear what they’re saying.’ Maybe they’re talking about the trades. I don’t know what they’re talking about but I’m going to find out what they’re talking about.
“And they both look at me. And I’m like ‘ooh,’ you know that busted, you’ve been caught eavesdropping type deal? I’m like ‘oh man that sucks.’
“They kind’ve kept talking but I couldn’t hear what they were saying, and it wasn’t like they were far away. You know, dreams have their own rules, so they’re talking but I really couldn’t hear them.
“But what I did notice, Madison Bumgarner was eating a bowl of Peanut Butter Captain Crunch, and I thought to myself ‘Damn, I haven’t had Peanut Butter Captain Crunch in a long time’…I just thought ‘I would love some Peanut Butter Captain Crunch, just a few bites that would be great.’
“I thought well maybe if Bumgarner doesn’t eat it all I can just take a few bites off the side or off the top or whatever when he’s done with it. So he’s getting ready to hand me the bowl, and I’m getting ready to take the bowl and put it in the sink. Maybe he wanted me to clean it out I don’t know. And I’m thinking ‘Okay cool. He didn’t eat the whole bowl of cereal. I’m gonna go grab a spoon and maybe have a couple bites.’
“But for whatever reason, Madison Bumgarner took his thumb and stuck it in the cereal bowl. And he like pushed all the cereal down in the milk with his thumb, and then licked his thumb off and did it again. I don’t know what hand it was, left hand I guess.
“So I made the decision just to dump it down the drain, rinsed it out, put the bowl on the side, looked down below the cabinet, and they were gone. It was like, poof, they were gone. They didn’t get up and walk out they were just gone. And like that I woke up.”
We’re not sure what any of this means, but we do want a case of whatever beer Tolbert drank before going to bed. And a bowl of Peanut Butter Captain Crunch while we’re at it…
Listen to the full story below.